My girls may cost me a bit of money in chicken feed, some time in coop maintenance and can be slightly annoying when they think they’ve found a better laying spot than the convenient nesting box designated by me (finding over twenty eggs on top of the coop after weeks investigating various reasons why my girls may have gone off the lay in the middle of summer was more than slightly annoying if I’m honest!) – but at least they deliver me Quiches, Omelettes, Cakes and Eggs Benedict with homemade Hollandaise Sause when I require it.
Not all poos are created equal.
So, let’s return to the smelly matter of excrement for a moment. If you’re a gardener then you’ll know all too well that the next best thing to organic matter/compost for your garden (whether it be ornamental or edible) is animal manure. But before you all rush out to the local dog-park with a bucket and pooper scooper just cool your heels as the word ‘animal’ in this context does not include those carnivorous woofers I’m afraid.
Aged chicken poo on the other hand is ideal as it is one of the most nutritious and balanced NPK manures available and is also rich in trace elements (ie. micronutrients such as Iron, Zinc, Manganese, Boron etc) and therefore perfect for growing fruit and vegetables, whilst also being good for most ornamental plants (except for some phosphorous sensitive natives, mainly those in the Proteaceae family – note the highlight on the word ‘some’ however as the list really isn’t as extensive as most people think as the vast majority can tolerate it fine).
Pelleted chicken manure was therefore the only fertilizer I ever bought from suppliers before I got my girls. And I generally always recommend bagged pelleted poo to any of my clients who don’t have their own chickens as one of the best all round organic fertilizers on the market. However, commercial chicken manure has two main drawbacks worth mentioning:
It’s expensive (relative to the cost of keeping chickens that is, factoring in the price of eggs also) and
It stinks! Although that funky smell doesn’t last long, and if you really can’t tolerate it then alternative commercial fertilizers can be used, but the first drawback (ie. cost) will still apply to those anyway and, after you’ve tallied your annual fertilizer bill, over time you’ll ultimately discover that your home-grown produce is probably no cheaper than that good organic stuff you can buy at the local farmers-markets without lifting a finger (other than to hold your expensive Hemp Tote shopping bag that is).
Another veggie-garden input product which is essential, but also expensive, is hay mulch. I use the broad term ‘hay’ to cover all the different types of soft mulch available for purchase (e.g Lucerne, Sugarcane and Pea Straw), subject to taking out a second mortgage on your home to fund a regular supply given the price that is!
So, when you add this to all the other input costs of soil, compost, potting mix, fertilizer and organic pest management products etc then you can almost guarantee that your home-grown fruit and veggies will work out to be dearer per kilo than black truffles!
Of course, if money is no object and your primary motivation for growing your own food is for the fun and pure joy and delight in being one-hundred-percent certain that your food is fresh and chemical free then swipe that credit-card until your heart is content baby! If, however, you’re not independently wealthy but still want the aforementioned fun and joy then I strongly suggest you get yourself some chickens instead.
Why so you ask?
Well because once you introduce chooks into the fray the numbers will start to come out in your favour in terms of the microeconomics (or is it macroeconomics…?) of permaculture production – thanks mainly to a concept known as ‘economies of scale’, or at least that’s how my economist wife assures me it works.
Or to put it more simply for the uninitiated, when the money you’re spending on hay goes towards producing both fertilizer and eggs, then in addition to providing your garden with mulch, the total output of your permaculture operation suddenly becomes a viable proposition – or at the very least provides you and your family with organic food cheaper than you could source from those bearded hipsters in overalls out at EPIC.
Returning to the canine comparisons for a minute, pooping incessantly isn’t the only thing chickens have in common with dogs. They can also make great pets.
Ok perhaps they won’t stare lovingly into your soul like ‘mans best friend’ or fetch sticks and ward off burglars, and they can be a little tetchy about having a leash affixed to their little necks for daily walks around the neighbourhood (only kidding, I don’t actually recommend this – although it would be a sight to behold!).
But chooks can still be a lower maintenance option as domesticated animals the whole family can enjoy. Just don’t get too attached as they generally don’t live that long mind you – but at least their poo is horticulturally useful.